Through The Mud Clearly

Remember last year when I was riding the city bus a lot? I wrote several “bus stories” because…I was riding the bus. Today I was reminded about one particular rider. The one I am referring to is the gentleman who I thought could be Tiny Tim’s older brother. You know…Tiny Tim of “Tip Toe Thru The Tulips” fame. He definitely had the hair and the clothes. Anyway, today a young man came into the office. He looked like he could be Mr. Tim’s younger brother; or possibly his son. He had the same hair, facial features and mannerisms. I kept waiting for him to break out the ukulele, but he never did. After his appointment, the probation officer came in my office and said: “did you see that kid that just left?” Yes I did. “Didn’t he look just like Tiny Tim?” “I was waiting for him to play the ukulele”! I then shared my bus story with her. Funny huh.

I couldn't let the deaths of Eunice Kennedy Shriver and Senator Ted Kennedy go without mention. Eunice was the champion of the Special Olympics and I am sure her absence will be felt greatly. Ted Kennedy has been a fixture in Washington for as long as I can remember. Although I was not a supporter I feel it is appropriate to honor him and his family. The Kennedy name has endured many triumphs, tragedies and scandal. Although there are more Kennedys in high profile settings, none will ever come close to the "fame" of John, Bobby, John Jr and Ted. Rest in peace senator Kennedy. It is the end on an era.

OK, so anybody who knows me realizes that I am "directionally challenged". Meaning: I get lost or turned around easily. Today I was on my way over to feed the dog and cat when I decided I needed something to eat. I thought Taco Bell sounded good so I turned down Bell Road in search of one. I made a turn into who knows where and encountered a maze of streets leading to unknown locations. No Taco Bell. Well, I wound my way through until I came to a main road. Here, you were only able to go right so I did. Then, thinking I was on the correct path to the Wright house, I made another right. Guess what?? I was back in the same maze of unknown streets. Hummm, I thought, maybe if I just go to the next signal I can get on the right path. By then I had given up on finding a Taco Bell and decided to hit whatever drive-thru came in sight. So anyway, the next signal did little to get me in the right direction. I did however, find a Sonic. Upon leaving the Sonic, I took a wild guess and drove in that direction. It was right!!! Lady was VERY happy to see me. She greeted me as only she can. WooWoo! I made her even happier when I gave her part of my hamburger! I figured she deserved it because she had to wait extra long for her dinner. Sparky was glad to see me too. She is laying as close to the keyboard as she can possibly get...purring contentedly. No more side trips for me....unless I have a navigator.

(I had this ready to post a week ago, but for some reason neglected to publish it)

Actually it was a wasp. A wasp of Biblical proportions! I was in the garden (which at the moment is just dirt and weeds) weeding. Marmalade was by my side observing my every move. Suddenly, this huge insect flew by at an alarming rate of speed! It doubled back and attempted to land on my bare foot. Not wanting to be stung-I foolishly fling a dirt clod at it. Bad idea. This made the giant wasp angry and it flew directly at me..hitting me. The impact made it fall to the ground (probably with a concussion). Now, my cat sees the wasp wriggling on the ground and tries to get it. She lets out her crazy cat meow at bats at the insect. Well, I had to take charge of the situation. I certainly didn't want Marms to get stung! I captured the behemoth between a trowel and a stick. I could actually feel the wasp's vibration on the trowel. Now what? For a second I thought about letting it go, but quickly decided against it. So, I'm standing there with a deranged bee and an almost as deranged cat. I had to kill it. As I am trying to squish the thing, it shoot out a very large stinger! Fortunately it was aim away from me and the cat. Finally, after chopping it into 3 pieces it was dead. I would have taken a picture of it but I need batteries for the camera. Trust me...it was huge! Going to get batteries now.

And now....the results of the foot xray...........Drum roll please! Its bone spurs accompanied by "mild arthritis". There is also a nerve involved but I don't know how yet because I haven't actually seen the Doctor (next month). This information came from the messaging service from Dr's office. What is the recommended treatment you ask? According to WebMD and other Internet sources there are several options. Anti inflammatories, cortisone shots, orthadics (shoe inserts) and "sensible shoes". I already wear sensible shoes so I think I will vote for the inserts!

Or maybe it was a toad. I don't know. More on that later. I was going to write this post last night but the storm knocked out the Internet! Anyway, let me tell you about last night's adventure. It was a dark and stormy night (really). The thunder was booming and the lightening was flashing all around. There was a deluge of rain. It was great...except for one thing. Marmalade is afraid of storms. She gets all wild eyed and hides. Well, this storm lasted at least 30 minutes (still raining this morning)and about half way through I thought about Lady (dog ) who is also afraid of storms. I thought about her because I am pet sitting her and Sparkly Doo Dah (other cat in story) while their owners are away. I was worried about her even though she has a great dog house in her backyard. Well, I knew I had to go over there after the storm, and my cat settled down. Finally, the storm moved on. I found Marmalade scrunched under the microwave cart. After coaxing her out and reassuring her that the worst was over, I got in my car and went to Lady's rescue. It was about 9pm. I expected to encounter the storm somewhere along the way. I didn't. When I got to that part of town everything was as dry as a...desert. No rain , no wind, no storm. I was happy about that. I let Lady in the house while I went outside and moved her dog house . If it did storm later she would be better protected from the elements. When I came in; Lady was snoozing on the carpet and the cat was totally ignoring me. This will change in a couple of days...her owners had only been gone a few hours so she isn't missing them yet! Probably by Monday she will be more social. I stayed for an hour or so. I went to let Lady out and there was a large frog/toad at the door. I think it wanted in (don't worry I didn't bring it in). I opened the door, frog hopped away and Lady refused to get up and go outside. Finally she went out. However, she stood at the door and gave me her "I am very sad please let me in" look. I didn't fall for it though because it was late (waaaaay past my bedtime) and I needed to go home. I went home to find the storm had returned for round two! Marmalade was hiding, lawn chairs were flying around in the backyard, trash cans were falling over, sirens blaring and dogs howling. What a night!

So yesterday I went to my doctor about my neck thing. He said I have several options.
1. Learn to live with it (do nothing)
2. Take an anti- inflammatory religiously…meaning every day whether I need it or not.
3. Go for several weeks or months of physical therapy (3x a week) which may or may not help….or
4. Surgery to block the nerves.

I chose option # 2.
Then I told him about this pain I have been having in my foot. After he examined my foot he said I might have a “wild nerve similar to the one in my neck”. Crazy huh?! He then wrote a prescription for an x-ray which I am having done on Friday. I will keep you posted!

Sorry, no pictures, I have to get batteries for my camera! The other day I cut off Goliath's brothers' head and took it over to Danny and Kathy's' house. Bethany wanted to know why I didn't bring the whole plant. I explained to her that it was huge and I would have to dig it up...a lot of work. I asked her why she wanted the whole thing and her reply..."we could study it". So....the next morning I went outside and dug the stalk up. I put the root end in a plastic bag and put the giant stalk in my car...it barely fit! I then drove over to their house. On the way over I got several strange looks from other drivers. After all its not every day you see an orange car with a big leafy sunflower stalk driving down the road! The big leafy sunflower stalk wasn't driving, I was. Just wanted to clear that up! So, now they have the entire sunflower-in two parts. Last I saw it, it was leaning up against the house on the back porch! I hung out with them for a while..enjoying coffee and donuts. After that , I went to the local Christian bookstore to buy a new bible to replace the one which was stolen. I found one that was exactly what I wanted (NIV LARGE PRINT) and it was even on sale! I also bought a couple of CDs by Casting Crowns. When I got home from my adventure, I noticed the dirty birds were extremely interested in the remaining sunflower. I got my big knife and went out and cut its head off and brought it in. That head is going to my friend Jayne. I then went out to the garden and knock over (with great effort) the remaining two stalks. I now have to dig them out. There is a large hole where I dug out the first one. So, this morning my cat and I go out to the garden to observe the sunflower carcasses. Marmalade spies the hole and jumps in. She fits in it quite nicely! (I said it was a big hole) She peers over the top and every now and then she jumps out and attacks the dirt! I drink coffee. The end.

Or….Some things I have learned about gardening.

Digging a garden is hard work, befriend someone with a rototiller.
Sunflowers don’t like to be transplanted.
Bugs and insects of every kind will visit. Some will stay.

Buy more seeds than you think you need.
Plant more than you think will grow…you can always thin the herd.
The weeds and grass will always grow faster than any plants.

Nobody will voluntarily help you weed.
Throw a garden party. When the guests arrive hand em’ a pair of gloves and a trowel. Say: “SURPRISE it is really a weed pulling party”.
The people who stay are your true friends.

Get more than one tomato plant.
Plant lots of corn. Each stalk only yields two ears! Who knew!!?
Make sure you cover newly planted and young sprouts. I use homemade chicken wire cages.
Birds have very good eyesight and will eat the newly planted and young sprouts if not covered.
If you have a bird problem, get 50 cats! Or just cover your plants.

Marauding ants can be killed with baking soda…just don’t get any on your plants; they will turn brown.
If you think your garden is big enough-its not.

Amazingly your cat will not sit on or eat the plants.

Visit and enjoy your garden at every opportunity.